Imagine a day where you have peace of mind and a tranquil life. You wake up feeling good about yourself, and you know that you can accomplish anything you put your mind to. You believe in yourself, and you look forward to your future.
If you’re lacking in self-confidence and self-esteem or feel anxious, then we need to look at your inner world and outer world to see where things are out of balance for you.
Self-help means that you are willing to do the work to make your desires real. This is not always easy, but it’s worth it. It’s not enough for things to be good enough. “Good enough” costs you a higher quality of life and joy.
Emma had always felt held back. She was afraid of saying the wrong thing or doing the wrong thing. It seemed like she was living her life for everyone but herself. Her family was supportive of her, but at the same time they were also critical. They wanted her to do what they wanted her to do. They didn’t come out and say that outright, but they implied it in a roundabout way, through their vocal intonations or subtle behavior.
Emma felt conflicted because she had her dreams, but she wanted to make her family happy and proud of her, so she felt really stuck. She would venture out with her dreams a bit, but would soon feel the curious eye of criticism come her way from her family.
She settled for “good enough”.
It’s not that her life was terrible, but it’s just that it wasn’t what she wanted, and she was suffering inside. She grieved for the life she knew she wanted.
How can you start to feel happier, more confident, worthy, and relaxed? There are some key areas to evaluate that affect your inner and outer world.
- Self-mastery. It’s important to recognize the thoughts, beliefs, and emotions you have that are running you on autopilot. You may be repeating patterns in your life because you have beliefs in your subconscious mind that are finding evidence to make them seem true. You may also be out of touch with your emotions, or your emotions may be consuming you. By working with your emotions, and where they are being held in your body, you can begin to move forward.
- Expand your consciousness and forgive. Self-forgiveness is one of the hardest things a person can do. The things you may have said or done in the past can be really hard to put behind you. Forgiving others who have harmed you in your past can also set you free. That doesn’t mean that you have to tell them that you forgive them or accept their bad behavior. It simply means that you grieve that experience so that you can forgive and move forward.
- Release perfectionism, control, and overachievement. It can be normal to be a perfectionistic, controlling overachiever when you’ve had a tough past, or you had to be the smartest, most responsible person. This is a coping mechanism to make sure that you’re “good enough” to feel safe and secure. You can start by making a safe mistake (like misspelling a word in an email to a close friend), or taking on less responsibility. It will feel bad at first, but over time, you’ll get more and more used to it.
- Create healthy relationships. Communication and boundaries are an important part of having a healthy relationship with yourself and others. Recognizing dysfunction in yourself and others, and creating a powerful circle of support are important to your success.
- Manage your stress. We are way too busy and take on way too much responsibility. Stress is toxic and it’s critical to minimize it to help your body relax. Keep in mind that even if you reduce your stress through things like meditation, if you have toxic people or situations in your life, your success will be short lived. Is it time for a toxic sweep?
- Build self-confidence and self-worth. Step into your future self and step out into the unknown. This can be a really scary activity to do! Let go of any social anxiety, and take action towards your vision and desires.
- Develop your intuition and trust yourself. When you listen to what your soul is telling you, you are free to take inspired action and manifest your dream life.
- Like and love yourself. You have a subconscious definition of self-love, and it’s finding evidence to make it true. Do you know what your subconscious definition is? You can look to the patterns in your life to see what your subconscious belief is about love. When you become more aware of it, you can begin to change it to like and love yourself more fully.
If you just started with one thing above, this alone could put you on a completely different path in your life. You would be able to say yes to yourself and your dreams. You deserve to feel peaceful, confident, worthy, and relaxed; when you do, it allows you to listen to your soul and take inspired action towards your future.
When you evaluate and address key areas of your life, and set clear goals towards your dreams, you will create the life you want
What action step are you willing to do today? Remember not to let “good enough” steal your joy. Leave me a comment below to let me know.